In a move the Ringling Brothers wish they’d created, Dominic Deville (in the above picture–picture removed due to potentially frightening away readers) launched a heart-stopping venture in Lucerne, Switzerland. His mission: to scare children as their birthday treat. While the term “treat” is what he calls himself on his website, it seems wildly exaggerated in my opinion. Santa has nothing on this guy.
For many years, smiling birthday clowns have been unintentionally a part of this birthday magic, leaving children in therapy talking through the permanent scars and dealing with their coulrophobia. What brought on his genius start-up idea, you ask? Deville reveals his source of confounding inspiration–wait for it–horror films. You never saw that coming, did you?
So what does he do? He dresses up as an evil clown and follows kids around during a 7-day period while sending them texts or notes saying they are being pursued and watched. But not strictly for fear’s sake, lest you fancy him inhumane. His goal is to catch up with the targeted child and throw a cake in their face. If he doesn’t manage to hit them, he gives them a cake for their birthday.
Here’s a mind-boggling fact: the parents pay for this.
If at any time the “fun” becomes a little too much for the child and the parents ask him to, the clown ceases and desists and probably keeps the change. He promises never to show up at a workplace or break into a home. After all, even an evil clown has boundaries. While such chilling frivolities may melt the strongest American children into a quivering puddle, Deville says that Swiss children seem to enjoy being scared senseless, in what I can only write off as yet another sign of the wussification of America. Just kidding.
I’m wondering, would you let your kid hang around with a child whose parents hired an evil clown to chase him for a birthday present?
Side note: For you unemployed folks, here’s a venture to look into. So you know, I charge a $50 referral fee if you do in fact become an evil birthday clown and make millions. You’re welcome.
Sweet dreams tonight!
